I feel like I'm taking Crazy Pills

You know how sometimes life just seems to get out of hand?

I'm there now.

There are several factors.

1) I still have boxes of crap our belongings in several rooms in the house. Everything doesn't have a place therefore everything can't be in its place. It drives me bonkers but I feel like the only time I have to conquer the box beasts is Saturdays and Sundays. And Sundays I try to treat as the day of rest, as I have been taught... but I'm finding it more difficult to do so.

2) I have a puppy. LOVE HER! But she is kind of crazy, as is expected with a 4 month old pup. She is growing fast. She is in the teething stage of life and although I haven't suffer many casualties by way of shoes or things being completely destroyed my hands have suffered from her biting. I've tried the holding her mouth closed, yelping like a puppy and tucking her lip under her teeth so she is basically biting herself. All of these methods seem to get her more excited and more mouthy. I seriously feel like the worst puppy mom ever. She seems to have gotten worse the last few weeks, but we have also gotten of our routine. I'm hoping that getting back to that routine, hoping that she gets more sleep, etc, will help. I am get frustrated and like I said I feel like I am doing something wrong which makes me feel like the worst puppy mom ever.

3) Church. I feel that I am failing at church. Moving to a new ward has not really helped. We have been in our house 2.5 months. We go to sacrament most Sundays, we know like 2 people in our ward that we talked to while we were fixing the house and they moseyed on over to say hi. Maybe I have just been spoiled with awesome wards thus far in my 27 years of life but I really find it weird that no one has reached out to us in that 2.5 months of time. No phone call, no coming to our house, nothing. Well I did get a belated bday present from the relief society but unfortunately I wasn't home when they brought it so I didn't get to meet them. I have a hard time going to places where I don't feel like I know anyone and church is becoming one of those places. I mean no one even talks to us when we go to church. It's weird to me! It really makes me wish that I were a super extrovert and that is was easy for me to just talk to people and make people be my friend but I can't muster the courage to do that. Its just not a natural easy thing for me.
I know there are things that I could/should be doing for my own personal spiritual growth and those things have fallen by the wayside as well. I have noticed a difference in myself, I don't like it. It isn't helping me and it isn't helping my husband either. I have made a mental note of the things I need to get back in to my routine that I know will help me to feel better about myself, my life and well just all around better.

4) I've lost my journal. Okay it isn't exactly lost it is just lost in the mess of item #1. Having a journal has always helped me sort out stuff, get over stuff and just get things off my chest and brain. I guess I never realized how important is was to me (cause I am not the most consistent journal writer) until I have gone without it. Now I miss it.

5) My to-do list. There are so many things that I would like to get done, that aren't housework, but I just can't squeeze them in. Lets be honest, not even the regular house hold chores are getting done because I feel I have so little time and things that are more important. So my house just looks like a pig sty most of the time. A lot of "little" projects at my house seem to unravel into much bigger things. Example: I have a crap craft table that I want to move to our 2nd kitchen easy enough right? Wrong, in order to move it down there I need to move some cupboards that are sitting on the floor, which I need to decide if I still want them downstairs, really I would rather have shelving ceiling to floor where they use to be. So just build shelves? Well currently there is a dryer and unused washer in that space. We have a washer upstairs in our garage that we use and plan to put the dryer up there too BUT that takes some electrical rewiring or wiring which we (by we I mean my hubby cause I know nothing about that stuff and he is genius, I just flip the breaker switches and bring tools or beverages) haven't had time for. So at our house, one does not simply move a table to its new home.

You may wonder what we are spending all our time on. Well I am up at 5 AM to get up, get puppy up, walked, fed, and pottied. Then I have to get ready for work, feed myself, make lunches for me and hubby. We also play with puppy and do some training with her. Takes me about 45 mins to get to work, sometimes I workout at lunch, 60 minutes home (yay traffic), make dinner (hubby walks and feeds the puppy), eat, clean up (dishes by hand, no dishwasher), play/train puppy. Usually by this time it is 7:30 or 8, I'm EXHAUSTED and I really just want to go to sleep but I still haven't accomplished anything on my to-do list.

In my mind, once I get all those boxes cleaned out and everything has a place then that will solve a lot of this. I am staying up til about 10:30 or 11 trying to get things off my list and get organized.

A New Family Member

Friday the hubby and I picked up our puppy. It was awesome! I was happy, excited and nervous. Here I am taking home this little puppy that I am now responsible for the outcome of this puppy's life. The way that she acts will be my responsibility. Everyone told/warned me how hard it is to have a puppy, like I've never had one before. I've had dogs most of my life so I know what it is like having a puppy... but did I really? When you have a puppy as a youth typically your parents end up taking care of it. You get to pick up the poop and that is about it, well for me anyway.

Our puppy's name is Isis, no not after the terrorist group but the Egyptian god of family, love, and marriage. My weekend with Isis, and the dog we were puppy sitting, was pretty awesome. We had some potty accidents, which is to be expected, but I was to impressed some cousins when I told Isis to go potty and she did so immediately. She is so smart after only this weekend she is getting the hang of sit and go potty. She has made it a full 3 hours in her crate, and she hasn't made a mess in her crate, yet.

Her first night away from her mama and siblings her little whimper was so sad, it actually made me tear up a little bit. Sometimes she whines when we put her in her crate sometimes she doesn't but he does not whine nearly as much as I expected. And she is more mellow then I was anticipating.

This will be my test to see if I can handle being a mom. Children sort of terrify me. Being the one that has to take care of this lil fur ball all the time also kind of terrifies me. I mean I'm in it with the hubby so I am not alone. Sometimes it is hard to say no to her adorable little face and sometimes (after little sleep Wednesday, Thursday and Friday) I get stressed cause she just peed in the same room 3 times within about an hour. In my tired little mind it was like, "great she is peeing everywhere! I can't do this, I don't remember how to potty train. I am the WORST puppy mom EVER!!" My hubby reassured me that I am not the worst puppy mom ever and calmly removed her from the room and cleaned up the mess.

She is uber adorable and fairly mellow. We took her to a family party on Sunday and she was so good just hangout while everyone greeted and pet her. With all that interaction she was pooped! I'm so excited to have her in our little family and can't wait to see her grow and learn more.

If you are getting a puppy I would recommend Cesar Millan's Short Guide to a Happy Dog. I haven't even made it all the way through the book and I feel like it has helped me a lot. I feel like I understand dogs better than I have.

I just love her to pieces and can't wait for all the crazy adventures that our ahead of us.

Keeping up Appearances

I'm sort of awful at this blog writing thing these days. It has been 2.5 months of craziness! It has been full of burning the candle at both ends working late at the house, carpooling to work with the hubster, fighting of the feeling of absolute overwhelming-ness and chasing deer out of our yard.

I had a co-worker that told me to expect to see deer on a daily basis, just about. I didn't believe him. Now I do. Almost everyday that we pull up to work on our house there is a deer or 2 or 7. Last night we had 2 bucks and about 5 does. I chased them away from our cheaply protected veggie garden. I don't care if they are in my yard just don't want them eating my veggies... well they have already consumed some of my plants beyond repair. I think I might get cucumbers. Anyway when they originally got into our little netted off garden I cried. I had so much hope and excitement and they ate it all. Lets just say Bambi and I aren't on good terms this year. Our goal is to save money to build a fence that is "deer proof" but that can get expensive so we will see. On a positive note, they cleaned up all our fallen, and no good, apricots.

In our house adventures I have learned I never want to hire another contractor so long as I live. It is not that our contractor was horrible, he was nice, it was the people that he hired that weren't my fav. Because of the way our loan was we didn't have control of the money it was the bank. If I did I would have paid the sub-contractors myself and they could get paid when they did their job right. I am not a professional and it is sad when I can do a job better than someone that gets hired as one. I felt like all we could do was complain to our contractor. Our plumber was the WORST. I think he ended up coming back and fixing almost everything thing that he touched/installed. We are finally near the end. All that is left is fixing a hole in the wall that had to be made for the plumber to fix his mistake. hopefully they can handle doing a good job on fixing the wall. We have moved most of our stuff into the house we are just waiting for a certificate of occupancy from the inspector. It has been a roller coaster to say the least. I am just excited to move in and live there!

Come the 2nd week of August we will have a little furry addition to our family!! We have a female Greater Swiss Mountain dog reserved in a litter that just turned 6 weeks old yesterday! Except for the last 5 years I have had a little furry dog companion in my life. I'm excited to have that again and be sharing it with my husband, who will be a first time dog owner. I am excited and nervous cause it has been 15 years since I have had to handle the puppy stage. Granted my last dog acted like a puppy up until the last few days of her life. There are a lot of things that I want for this dog that I didn't have for other puppies in my life. Crate training will be a new thing, most of my dogs growing up were outside dogs, except when too cold in the winter. However when Abby slept inside I could hear her sneaking around checking out places she wasn't normally allowed. Now that I have my own house I get to get a large dog, like I have always wanted, and it can sleep inside every night. I could go on and on about how excited I am to have her in my life. I also found out there is a chance I may be able to bring her to work with me. I'll have to get another crate for under my desk but I kind of really hope it happens. I will create a presentation to argue why we need dogs readily available for a pet items team to utilize for their products. =)

There are times I am really super grateful to have certain people in my life. I know I should feel this way all the time but you all know how life goes and we take things for granted. I am grateful for my mom. The reason that is sticking out right now... well there are several. First, she is super handy and has helped the hubby and I A LOT when it comes to our remodeling project. Her skills and knowledge have been priceless, well technically she has probably saved us money with her knowledge. I am also very glad that she is willing to spend hours of her time helping us. She has been out at our house almost as much as we have. I honestly don't know how she does all the amazing things that she does. I'm convinced she is super woman and has just kept it secret this whole time. Another reason i am grateful for my mom is that she lets me run my own life, and has for a long time. She taught me right from wrong and let me govern myself. I had rules and I knew that breaking those rules had consequences that never ceased. I'm sure if you ask my siblings I had less rules and got away with more, and that may be true, but I'm going with I was just more angelic (sshh don't tell them). Seriously though, the only things my mom pushed me or nagged me about was cleaning up my room (and after myself) and doing good in school. When she didn't agree with choices I was making in my life she would let me know she was concerned and why and that was it. I will admit now I probably should have listened but I didn't and I learned my lesson. Other than that she just let me do my thing. She never bothered me about when I was going to get married, get a Phd, get a job or have babies. She just accepts that I will get there and do that when it is my time. I LOVE IT! I love my mom. She is the best.

Well that is all for now.  =0)

Reality Check?

Wow! 7 months can fly by quickly. Nutshell update:

Got a new job 7 months ago

Signed for a new house 3 weeks ago

Lost my best friend's mom (so my other mother) 2 weeks ago

5 days ago was my 2nd wedding anniversary.

Been working 8-14 hour days every week day and then (on those 8 hour days) going out to the new house and doing manual labor to get some things improved.

At the end of the month my hubby and I are going to be foster parents to a kitty names Eva

Nutshell update done.

Sitting in the lender's office signing paper after paper after paper made me realize that I am no longer 20. I tend to forget that I keep aging each year. Also, that after 2 years of marriage I still suck at signing my last name.

I love our house. In all of it's need for love glory. We have land and a decent sized house. And I love all the work and would rather do that than my paying job. The thing that I think has been the hardest for me about the house is all the help people offer but don't follow through with. I don't know why it bothers me so much. Probably because for me when I offer help or say I am going to do something I do everything in my power to get it done or anything I need to in order to be there to help and I don't get why other people are like that. I've had tons of people offer their help but only 5 people actually show up and help. What the heck? I know there are some that want to but can't because they have a new house of their own that they have to handle or are dealing with other life crisis things. Shrug another thing in life I don't understand.

I am excited and nervous to be a kitty foster parent. I've never owned a cat personally but I love animals so it should be really interesting.

Well, back to work

Peace out.