My Loneliness

My Loneliness..
It isn't for you
My heart has shut you out
Yet it still longs for someone
Boys I have liked
Can't seem to fill the space
Maybe I'll be lonely forever
Searching for the one that can make my heart whole
No one can seem to do the job to the fullest
Moments go by where I forget
But at night the darkness reminds me
The night left to think and wander
Who will fill this gaping hole
Its strange to be surrounded by people
And yet feel all alone
This is what my loneliness is made of.

Discouraging discouragment

I'm running on Friday for my marathon training. I've been running for about 7.5 miles. At this point I'm running slightly uphill and the wind is pretty strong and I'm running into the wind. From what I planned on running I'm only about half way done with my run. Well this point I feel like I can't run anymore. Seriously felt like just collapsing and crying on the grass I was running by. I just wanted to give up. The wind continued to blow harder so that I was jogging but I actually felt like I wasn't really going anywhere. I force myself to run a mile and a half longer. I am stillabotu 2 miles away from home. I walked those 2 miles. Not really glad that I crapped out when I've gone beyond 7.5 miles before. I don't know what happened but I was very discouraged and upset with myself. With that sort of thing happening I'm not sure I'll be able to run a marathon... sheesh... ugh well gotta carry on somehow.